S2 Episode 2: Kink Lesson in Consent | "Leo & the Very Unpleasant Word"

This episode is a lesson in "consent." Often ignored or brushed past quickly, Meg argues that this topic of the most important topic to discuss on your own sexual journey and personal Erotic Renaissance. She introduces why this topic is so important before sharing a story about Princess and Leo, entitled, "Leo & the Very Unpleasant Word." This story is shared to (1) juxtapose Lumiere's show of self-control and (2) to provide an entryway into the complex topic of "consent."

Enjoy the story and learn from the experience shared here that you don't have to settle for less than the experience you want and desire most. As Meg reminds us in closing, "It is my hope that this story reminds everyone that sex is always going to be a better experience if someone chooses you. It feels better if someone wants you. It is satisfying when you both desire it with each other. And maybe the most emotionally satisfying sex is filled with intimacy that is constructed over time together. Because then, the other person desires your comfort and pleasure in such a way that one can rest easy in the experience and know you are safe to be present erotically, and savor and sense while in a vulnerable position."

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Sex Isn't Intimacy. Sex is pleasurable and becomes more pleasurable when you have intimacy. Not sold? Let's rethink love, relationships, and sex. Let me seduce you. You are listening to the Linguist of Love. Welcome to the Erotic Renaissance.

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Transcript

Introduction:

Hello! Welcome to the Erotic Renaissance, I’m Meg De la Torre, your Linguist of Love. Thank you for tuning in and enjoying another episode alongside me. If you made it to this episode, you will have heard of Lumiere, a submissive that joined me for a session in which we explored service and self-control. I boasted of this self-control, as you may recall, and today I bring a story to juxtapose alongside it in an effort to help explain “consent,” the single most important lesson on your sexual exploration journey and Erotic Renaissance. I will first give you a little context on “consent” before introducing a story that recently happened to me featuring a man with little self-control. And then before closing up, I’ll finish the episode with a call to action and summative statement on consent.

This episode is supported by Stella Lux Creations, owned by Carol – a wonderful friend of mine. We are actually doing a gift-away over on my Instagram, so you can check that out on my page @LINGUISTOFLOVE and another on my OnlyFans, where I am also known as LINGUISTOFLOVE – that is LINGUIST of LOVE. You can also find additional content for free and others for purchase through my website LINGUISTOFLOVE.COM You can find these links, including podcast partners, in the description below as always.

Context

I explained how I see “consent” as the single most important topic in one’s journey of sexual exploration. Here’s why: 

On a personal level, I have found that if an individual explores sexually without a mutual desire and expectations with another individual, one is likely to encounter trauma or the triggering of a past wound or trauma. If at this moment, you wish to point out the fun of not having expectations of what will happen, it is true that surprises on the way are what make sex so exciting and satisfying. However, if you want your partner to enjoy the experience, it is helpful to know the person you are exchanging sexual energy with intimately. Knowing them allows you and your partner to have more satisfying sessions. If I know what it is that could cause you to feel uncomfortable or hurt emotionally during play, then we can more safely explore the kinks and taboos that are in the core of you left unturned and still lying in ephemeral fantasy, or the floating thoughts that you never give enough attention to, because you’re scared to sit with them. 

As a Woman who finds herself in creation of the feral and the fantasy, I want to make sure that as my listeners and voyeurs venture to explore at their own pace, I want to equip you with the tools you need to more safely navigate relationships with others more productively, and explore and learn about the sensual soul within you. It is my aim to help guide you to the experiences that are most in alignment for your personal evolvement and heightened pleasure. And it has always been vitally important for me to really discuss “consent,” as I often find it quickly mentioned in a few sentences before play parties or ignored entirely. This episode is aimed at helping you see the importance of consent alongside how sexy it can be to hear someone else express desire for you. 

I am now going to present you with a story to illustrate and illuminate these points. While I would love to write this episode in a way that conveys the anger that I felt following this experience, I find it most arousing and empowering to write it as a parable and to teach a lesson, because I adore speaking in characters and emotions first and foremost – and as a Dominant, I rather enjoy teaching, so the topic of consent is on the agenda for today. 

Before we begin today’s episode, take a moment to relax and release any tension you might be holding in your body. Feel free to light a candle and set the mood for yourself. Let’s start by some communal breathing. Breathe in. And out. (3) And now, please prepare for a little lesson today. I bring Princess, the same character from last episode but introduce you to Leo, a powerful executive in the office that resides in the same area as our protagonist. I now present you the story, “

Leo & the Very Unpleasant Word

Leo couldn’t help that he had a lot of work to do. He found himself to be a lion in the office – much to do and fires to settle to nothing but dust at the end of the day. He didn’t have time for much – not even time to celebrate his birthday. Over the past month or two, he had quickly become acquaintances with the peculiar young woman a building away. While she called herself a Beast Tamer, he laughed to himself at a Woman who looked more like a kitten than a lion to him. And as for Snake Charmer…he would have really loved to see what she meant in regards to this title. But with no exciting offers to entice him to leave work, he  continued to put out fires until dusk this Saturday evening. In a huff, he left his apartment to hopefully continue the work call by the pool where he left a whiskey in the sunshine. It felt like maybe it was fate that he met Princess in the stairwell as she delivered a birthday card to him. 

He immediately began to dispel how awful his day had been, because he had a work emergency that had led him away from his planned day off. She listened and bemoaned how no one should ever work on their birthday, and when he asked her if she would like to celebrate his birthday, she nodded, saying, “It would be an honor to help you celebrate; I take important days like that very seriously.”

And she did. There was something magic about way the sun ventured once again to the exact spot in the sky it was in when one was born. So if having someone to dine and converse with on his birthday would be a joyful celebration, she was happy to join him. Princess knew he was interesting to talk to from some short conversations they had shared in passing, and a night chatting over dinner and a glass of Prosecco seemed like a nice wind down to the busy week. Some grounding energy felt like a nice way to balance her out after her Sensual Domme duties often kept her in the clouds of FantasyLand. 

She picked out a long blue-grey dress with buttons and slit revealing her thigh if she swayed back and forth just so. She paired it with a white floral kimono and her favorite jewelry that included a promise ring that she gave to herself to remind her that she wanted to love the next person to enter her. It was a blue sapphire ring that mysteriously had always been in her jewelry box, taking it from house to house from each family move. She hadn’t had sex in over a year and a half, and wanted the next sexual exchange she shared with another to be one that would be emotionally fulfilling in a new way for her. Although she loved and took great pleasure in sex, she just didn’t care for sex that didn’t make her feel something. She exchanged sensual energy all day with voyeurs online and with clients and submissives. So she was being fulfilled in other ways while she enjoyed this phase of her life, but sex was taking on a new meaning to hear, and the sacredness she saw within sex prompted her to explore it in a way she never had before – through love. 

As she prepared for the dinner, she felt strong in her convictions and didn’t worry about Leo. He had been an open-minded gentleman who had never come close to making her feel uncomfortable. So she relaxed into her most authentic self for the evening with no guard up. She didn’t feel she needed to be in Domme-mode, so she breathed deeply and relaxed her shoulders. Leo had even said to her last time they chatted that he felt that she “would be healing” for him. She considered how that aligned with her mission and the art she took such pleasure in creating. So she was excited to see Leo at her door. She enjoyed seeing that he did not enter without permission and was petting her puppy, Luna, in the entrance way. She invited him in as she finished adding the clear heels on her feet before taking her bag and keys to the door. 

Locking Luna in with a snack, the two departed for a restaurant. They chose a restaurant and went on their way. While this seductive siren would love to tell you all the details of the dinner, because it was a lovely and sensual dinner, we will leave out the details to protect the wicked in the aim of their own healing, and as I (the narrator) heal in the way that is best for me. Thus I won’t tell you of the gentleman at dinner who shared his relationship history with Princess and was reflective on his own self-sabotaging patterns, instead, I offer as a sacrifice for analysis the beast that arose from him as we left the restaurant. 

After a very interesting conversation and reflection over the most delicious and sensual dinner Princess had shared in some time, the two departed. He offered to take her to a dive bar nearby. The premonition of a pool table was the instant promise that had her in agreement. On the way, Princess shared her first post from OnlyFans – a list of promises she had made to her future husband as she began her journey as an Erotic Artist. A beautiful relationship had been something she had dreamed of for a long time, so she considered the promises she longed to make to such a soul as she began a soul’s mission that she knew would be different and push her in ways that would be challenging. 

Leo was moved by the exchange and joked about asking her to marry him as they pulled up to the dive bar, remarking, “Okay, you’re not allowed to look at me for the rest of the night, so I don’t fall in love with you.” Princess laughed, hoping the change in his energy would not be a sign of him trying to claim the spot like others had tried in the past. 

At the sight of the pool table, Princess smiled to herself. It was always so nice to hold a pool stick while sipping whiskey and listening to “Don’t Stop Believing.” Situated with drinks, they awaited an opening when Leo leaned in towards Princess’s face to whisper, a little too close for her, so she pulled back slightly. “I’m looking at you and am a little buzzed. I just want to warn you.” 

Confirming Princess’s intuition, she sighed but smiled, “Thank you for the warning.” She began to allow herself to raise her guard slightly, not knowing exactly what he meant by that. At first, it was just leaning a little too closely and positioning his hand slightly lower on Princess’s back when he tried to whisper to her. Nothing more than she could handle, she moved away from him when he violated her unspoken boundaries and conversed with a woman playing pool with them. When she returned to him, she made a point to keep distance, but he would ask her repeatedly to come closer and try to whisper, an interesting technique, she noted to herself as she came closer to see what needed to be so secretive. And that is when she met his hand that began to fondle her and the soft fabric covering her ass. Alarmed, she pressed him away, “You didn’t ask me if you could touch me,” she said in a tone of black and white.

“I have to ask?!” the credulous tone made her stare back in disbelief. She had not been so disrespected by over a year. 

“Yes,” she responded, “you do.”

“Oh, I don’t have any friends who don’t let me just touch them when I want to.” 

She ignored that obvious lie and returned to take her shot at pool. After she shot was complete, he returned to her, “I’m sorry, I should have asked.” As he said this, he moved his hand to her ass to feel it again. She pressed him away again. 

“You didn’t ask to touch me.” She felt more angry this time. 

Leo threw his pool stick on the ground and groaned, clearly showing more fourteen than forty-eight, but Princess was a Beast Tamer and was used to beasts trying to take advantage of her. So she allowed him to carry on in-front of the other bar guests in a juvenile display before he went outside to smoke. 

Princess took the opportunity to chat with some other nearby pool players when one of the girls playing approached her, “Is that your boyfriend?”

“No,” she laughed lightly, “we’re live in the same area, and I came out to celebrate his birthday with him.”

“You’re not lovers, are you?”

Princess laughed again, “Oh no, we are acquaintances.”

“Oh,” the girl noted, “he was telling us you were lovers.” Tbe woman laughed and showed pleasure at finding out he had lied.

Princess thanked the woman for letting her know what he had said and continued to play pool by herself, enjoying how sharply she was striking the balls one after the other. When Leo returned, he asked if they could make out now. 

Surprised his request, she laughed lightly. “No, thank you for asking though.”

“What!” It was more of an exclamation than a question, so Princess waited for him to continue. 

“Why?” He took extra time to drag out the Y. 

“Because I don’t kiss someone unless I want to.”

“But why don’t you want to kiss me?”

Knowing she owed this man no explanation, she also understood his frustration at being told such an uncomfortable sentence and offered an explanation. “I haven’t kissed someone in a long time, because I want to enjoy kissing them and I haven’t found someone I want to kiss right now.”

Leo furrowed his brow and returned to the bar, bringing with him more shots. Understanding the intention that Leo set when he purchased a third round of shots, she used the shot to cast a protection spell on herself. May this only enhance my own strength. She wished him happy birthday and downed the shot, allowing it to warm her throat and reach her stomach in a way that swirled with some annoyance that had settled there through the last half of the evening. 

Leo continued to consistently pressure Princess to kiss or touch him, so much so that it became very irritating to continually respond to his questions of “why not.” It was wearing on her in such a way that she had not experienced since her ex-husband, who had a tremendous power of manipulation. It was a energy that tasted like that sour flavoring on candies that made you wince in response upon the initial taste. The kind of energy that manipulates you slowly into settling for less. 

“I just wanna know why you won’t have sex with me right now.” The words came out in little breaths that showed either his ownemotional exhaustion or how inebriated he was. And despite all the lusty feelings she felt daily as a Sensual Domme, she felt absolutely none of them in this moment as she stood infront of a man who was whining about wanting to have sex with her when she knew he didn’t know who she was nor wanted to understand her values. She saw in an instant how if she would have given in to kiss him, he would’ve continue to ignore any new boundaries she would have set, and this is the precise moment in which that shot hit her blood and it pulsed within her, providing her shadows to rise to the surface as her patience grew thin. 

So she asked him a question back, “Wouldn’t you prefer that I desire you and want to have sex with you?”

“Yes, but – uhhh…” He never finished his statement but did say, “making out and sex are fuuuuun though.”

“I know,” she responded, “I love sex and see it as a very healing and beautiful practice. That is why I don’t want to have sex unless I know I truly desire that with someone.”

He continued to bemoan and request as they began to leave the pool table and close out of the bar. She was getting tired of trying to explain herself to someone who didn’t actually want to know why, so she allowed new words to take their place:

“La. Ana mish aiyzza.” She allowed the Arabic to release from her lungs effortlessly. The easiest way to tell this forty-eight year old boy no was in a language that she was only just learning. “Ana aiyzza aroh li beiti diluaatty. ” And like magic, the words allowed her to stand up for the Princess that would regret spending a single moment longer with this man who didn’t know her and could care less about each day she spent controlling her own carnal lust for a love that would give her something she wanted for herself. In silence, the two got in the car to return to the complex down the road.

And while I would love to say that the story immediately took a turn as the beast decided to become a man again, this one got more beastly. As he drove her back to their complex in silence, he interjected with saying, “I just don’t understand why you won’t have sex with me tonight.”

“Okay, I no longer feel safe with you,” Princess said, “Please let me out, so I can walk the rest of the way.”

And that is when Leo decided to swerve back and forth on the road in response. Princess screamed; his behavior instantly pulling her to memories of her husband who told her how he would kill her in the car by going over a bridge. She commanded him to stop. And he did. He parked, and she walked the boy up to his apartment door and left him standing at the dark entryway. “Good night, Leo.” Feeling emotionally exhausted from the gymnastics of explaining why “no” was going to have to suffice to a man who must have not heard the word often, she smiled to herself at avoiding falling into a negative pattern of her own – a pattern of settling. 

Fury began to burn within the walls of her skin at the memory of Leo’s forced touch and a technique of repeating his request to whittle the Woman down to the same her that would give in afterall. In her mind, she thanked him for the opportunity to settle for sex that wouldn’t satisfy her or her heart, and she thanked herself for not giving into a man that didn’t want to understand her values enough to listen to her or respect her request to stop asking her repeatedly. And then she thanked herself again. She thanked herself for learning a language that allowed her to say no in a way that didn’t leave room for “why not.” And she thanked herself for seeing the red flag she already knew the taste of, so she wouldn’t trust him with her safety ever again. 

She hopes that Leo is sitting down right now listening to this story all the way through and is seeing danger at his fingertips that he didn’t know he was capable of. Anger driving him to endanger a Woman he said was absolutely incredible and joked about wanting to marry. She hopes that hearing of the beast she met in him allows him to opportunity to see that the Woman’s own choices didn’t matter as much as his own inability to control himself. How violence came so easily to him when he didn’t get his way. And she hopes his own words ring most clearly during this reflective period, “I can tell you’re going to be really healing for me.” 

Thank you for listening to this tale that aims to demonstrate part of the complexity of consent. It is my hope that this story reminds everyone that sex is always going to be a better experience if someone chooses you. It feels better if someone wants you. It is satisfying when you both desire it with each other. And maybe the most emotionally satisfying sex is filled with intimacy that is constructed over time together. Because then, the other person desires your comfort and pleasure in such a way that one can rest easy in the experience and know you are safe to be present erotically, and savor and sense while in a vulnerable position.

 As always, thank you so much for tuning into the Erotic Renaissance, where my aim is to help society see that being a sensual and sexual Woman is something that can be and should be celebrated and that every soul is deserving of body autonomy and sexual liberation – that at everyone’s core is a little bit of kink waiting to be discovered, and that the sensual soul is a part of us all.

It is my hope that you found within this episode the subversive eroticism in a narrative that features a Woman finding courage within herself to stand in the face of a lion and roar back.

I am Meg De la Torre, your Linguist of Love, let me seduce you.